Read All About It

"Death came quickly and prematurely for about 700 turkeys on their way to be slaughtered when a semitrailer overturned early Wednesday." -breaking news and high-quality journalism from the Brunswick Star-News.
Best headline from yesterday's paper: "S.C. man spends 12 hours trapped under trash bin." The best part about this story was the Wizard Of Oz-like photo of the man's feet poking out below a dumpster (unfortunately not available online). Why is this paper even shipped to BHI?