Under the (British) Influence

"PS We miss you here - but we have finally worked out why you had to go back to a country where one can buy weapons at sixteen but can't have a cheeky ale until twenty-one. Initially we thought it was because you'd gone mental and had gone back to keep your kids away from Kevin Federlein, but in reality it was just 'cos your green card expired, wasn't it?

"PPS Please continue to say footpath, litter bin and always add a u to all -our word endings. Schedule has a shed in it and remember to say alyouminium. The colonies always love it - trust me." -the end of a great email from the very brilliant housemaster of West Bank. Miss you too, Steve!